I Am Not A-Mused

I need a MUSE to unblock my writer's block! Where's MY Muse???

One may not think that I need a Muse to aid in unblocking writer's block with the way I spew out articles on Themestream. I feel like an article machine sometimes. But, T.S. isn't the book I have to finish. I am not under the same contract that I am with my e-book company. These articles, although at times quite involved, don't require what I need to finish my book. I begin an article, I go through the middle and I come to an end all on a page.

A novel is much different.

There are times when I sit at the computer and stare at it. I tell myself to work on the ending of my book, but instead I connect to AOL and have writings all over the internet. I am then riddled with guilt for not facing the truth. (Heck, I'm even doing it now!)

I am blocked. I hate it. I need a MUSE!

I have read poems on T.S. about muses and their inspiration. I have read articles in Writer's Digest and other trade publications in which authors speak so freely of their "muse". I even watched that movie starring Sharon Stone and Albert Brooks called "The Muse".

I am without one; and I need one fast.

Why is it that when I wrote my original manuscript, the words flowed so freely? I knew exactly where I was going and what I wanted to accomplish.

Then came the rewrite. Everything changed.

I learned so much during the process, and still am. My work now is 100 times better than it originally was. I am extremely happy about that. But, I didn't get stuck before. I feel like a truck with its wheels spinning and I cannot stand it.

I feel the words bubbling to the surface; but that's where they're remaining. I need for them to bubble OUT of me onto the page.

Where's my muse?

I picture a puzzle in pieces and that's the rest of my story. I need to make them fit. It was easier before. Words flowed freely when I knew nobody wanted my work.

They also were poorly written.

Now, I have to finish -- let me correct that, I WANT to finish my manuscript and I need help!

I carry a notebook with me when I am downstairs just in case an idea pops up. I write them down when they do. Something will tell me that I need a new character description or I'll decide where, when and why to introduce a new character.

So, I have these incredibly useful notes which resemble the puzzle I told you about.

I've been under a tremendous amount of stress with family members ill. I've spent a great deal of time running back and forth from hospitals. I don't get much "unbroken, quiet" time where I can lock myself in a room and work in utter, sheer, wonderful silence.

Maybe that's what I need. Maybe my muse is here and is saying, "Hey, I'm here, just give yourself the time to focus and I'll come forth and help you."

I don't know. What I do know is that I will be amused when I do hear my muse!