Not Far From Hell

New York City... City of the Devil, Residence of Evil, Grave of God.

I hear shootings at night. I hear them when there are no real shots being fired. It is a background music for the rhythm of New York. If I don't play the stereo in the car, I hear the rhythm of NYC... BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!!! A man dies. You can hear him scream. Another wild animal in the concrete jungle goes down. We are all animals. Time never stops here, nor do the shootings.

I was fifteen when I saw a dying man. The bullet was fired at his thigh. Joey and I were walking back home from the candy store when we saw him lying by the dumpster in absolute pain. Joey said, "Look, that man's shot!" I said, "Cool!!!" The man said, "Help me! Please help me!" He said this in broken words and broken breath holding his thigh with both hands as if clinging on to his life. We put our hands in his pockets checking for cash or jewelery. Apparently, whoever shot the man also robbed him. We were disappointed... He was dead.

I hear shootings without shots being fired. I'm crazy... am I not? When I kill a man, its no big deal. I have done it before. I had killed myself when I killed Joanne. She was going to turn us in. I could not let her do that. You don't just let go off twenty grand and turn yourself in!!!

Was that all she was worth to me? And I thought I loved her... Christ!

I deserve to die... BANG!