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Platonic Antipathy

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Aragorn🔥
·May 03, 2000·1 min read·5 comments
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No! They don't know , they don't know ........

They don't know what's lie & true, They don't know why a man feels blue They don't know what's hunger & fear, They just live with their near & dear.

Say who are they who've fuelled this fire They go to pubs to quench desire They don't know what it means to be When their days meal is just a cup of tea.

Don't run after those neon lights They will soon fade ,leave you alone & crying You are just gonna end up nowhere 'Cos all sons of king don't end up being heir.

Another day goes by, but they still do not realize, What the hell are they here for, & what's the aim of their lives they are so goddamn sure , what can I tell thee guess i will have to keep MY PLATONIC ANTIPATHY.

What stayed with you?

A line that lingered, a feeling, a disagreement. Great comments are as valuable as the original piece.

Responses5

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Priyesh Ranjanarchive~2001-2003

i think when their days meal... should be when the days..

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Aragornarchive~2001-2003

well i am still referring to the same bunch of guys in this line as i was in the previous line bout quenching their thirst in pubs... a bit confusing probably,but i am entitled to some degree of poetic license i guess...

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Priyesh Ranjanarchive~2001-2003

it is the rich who have fuelled this fire it is the rich who go to pubs to quench desire so how can these rich people know what it means to be when the days meal is only a cup of tea... there u are referring to the rich all the time and thus using their in the last line creates ambiguity.... thanks

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Sreedheviarchive~2001-2003

I agree with priyesh... Also, for a subject matter that's so brimming with bitterness, it might seem more effective if it was conveyed in free verse rather than contrived rhyme. The "thee" especially looks out of place in an otherwise beautiful post-modern observation.

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Aragornarchive~2001-2003

thanx for ur observations,actually i wrote these lines as a song,thus the rhyming part... Cool by MAfer on June 26, 2001 (Tuesday) Well, i think i got wut u really wanted to say and I really luv it! I think all that u wrote was true..and all the ones who have read it....know wut r u talkina bout and thats pretty much what u really want ( i think) way to go!!

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